PREMIERE

1080p-ness Inserts Itself Into the Mega Python vs. Gateroid Battle Royale!

Thu, 23 Jun 2011 12:28:59 -0400

1080p-ness Inserts Itself Into the Mega Python vs. Gateroid Battle Royale!:

What happens when giant pythons get loose in the Everglades? You give the local alligators steroids so they grow big enough to kill them. Duh! Welcome to another low-budget Syfy production, where the only thing worse than the effects are the story and performances. This time they cast former teen…

1080p-ness: The P-Ness Takes A Dip With Dinoshark

Thu, 28 Apr 2011 16:16:29 -0400

1080p-ness: The P-Ness Takes A Dip With Dinoshark:

1080pness:

It’s a shark. It’s a dinosaur. It’s both! Frozen in the ice for over 150 million years, Dinoshark lays in wait. Witness Dinoshark’s tale of woe through glossy HD screenshots!

1080p-ness: The P-ness Pays Tribute To The Greatest Film Ever: Network

Mon, 11 Apr 2011 15:02:00 -0400

1080p-ness: The P-ness Pays Tribute To The Greatest Film Ever: Network:

1080pness:

Sidney Lumet died April 9, 2011! Sidney Lumet was one of the greatest film directors of all time, churning out classics like 12 Angry Men, Dog Day Afternoon, and The Verdict. His greatest film was Network, written by Paddy Chayefsky and starring Faye Dunaway, William Holden, Peter Finch,…

brutlyuth: Don’t do meth.

Fri, 08 Apr 2011 11:54:00 -0400

brutlyuth:

Don’t do meth.

brutlyuth: Teaser poster for The Dark Knight Rises.

Wed, 06 Apr 2011 12:08:05 -0400

brutlyuth:

Teaser poster for The Dark Knight Rises.

The P-ness Goes Carlito's Way

Mon, 21 Mar 2011 14:04:48 -0400

1080pness:

There’s a lot to love about this Brian De Palma 1993 gangsta flick about a Puerto Rican gangster recently released from jail and trying to start a new life. Every time the dude thinks he out, they keep pulling him back in!

They see Carlito rollin’. They hatin’.

“How about some POOL! Check out my TRICK SHOT!”

Carleeto no like the reflection. This little bar skirmish puts him back in the game. No, not the game of pool. The game of CRIME! Every time he tries to get clean, they keep covering him in DIRT!

[Click to see a bunch more Carlito!]

1080p-ness: The Pness Bites Into Sharktopus!

Wed, 16 Mar 2011 15:37:25 -0400

1080p-ness: The Pness Bites Into Sharktopus!:

1080pness:

It’s a shark! It’s an octopus! It’s both! It’s Sharktopus!!! (Now I’ve done it, I’ve run out of exclamation points. No I haven’t!!!!!!!!!!!!)

It’s a special day in this world when a hybrid-animal from the minds of Roger Corman and Syfy release a Blu-ray with this much awesomeness. The acting is… [CLICK ONLY IF YOU’RE PREPARED FOR AWESOMENESS!!!!]

Rambo: First Blood Part II Gets To Win This Time

Wed, 23 Feb 2011 19:20:34 -0500

1080pness:

Now that’s what I call a close shave. OH GOOD GLAYVEN!

Time to exfoliate…

Some bad guys!

Is there something on my face?

Bow to me.

I don’t get it. The bow gibe, that is.

What a dummy. Again, Blu-ray ruins a perfectly good gag.

Assplode time.

Sup, Rich. Off to go break some stuff and scream a lot. Lates!

YAAAAAAAAA…and so forth.

Now that’s a knife. The end.

1080p-ness: Natural Born Kills The Pness

Wed, 02 Feb 2011 13:15:46 -0500

1080p-ness: Natural Born Kills The Pness:

1080pness:

The key lime gets its day in court.

Plus lots more screen shots properly sized…

dbsw: “Poked To Death” T-shirt // by Zerobriant Only $10 at...

Thu, 06 Jan 2011 12:10:38 -0500

dbsw:

“Poked To Death” T-shirt // by Zerobriant

Only $10 at RIPT Apparel and only till 10pm PST. Get yours now!

Uh, you guys. Our birthday is coming up……

GPOYW. Last time we got a girl roses she said she wanted...

Wed, 05 Jan 2011 15:42:54 -0500

GPOYW. Last time we got a girl roses she said she wanted orchids. Fuck girls, you know?

oldfilmsflicker: Lester: You haven’t worked in a long time....

Tue, 04 Jan 2011 17:19:51 -0500

oldfilmsflicker:

Lester: You haven’t worked in a long time. She’s embarrassed.
Cliff: I’ve worked. It’s just nobody’s paying me.

Crimes and Misdemeanors, 1989 (dir. Woody Allen)

lyriquediscorde: Elaine Miller: If you break his spirit, harm...

Mon, 03 Jan 2011 16:33:22 -0500

lyriquediscorde:

Elaine Miller: If you break his spirit, harm him in any way, keep him from his chosen profession which is law - something you may not value, but I do - you will meet the voice on the other end of this telephone and it will not be pretty. Do we understand each other?
Russell Hammond: Uh, yes, ma’am…
Elaine Miller: I didn’t ask for this role, but I’ll play it. Now go do your best. Be bold, and mighty forces will come to your aid. Goethe said that. It’s not too late for you to become a person of substance, Russell. Please get my son home safely. You know, I’m glad we spoke.

nedhepburn: Tumblr is getting stale as fuck. There’s all these brands it seems ripping off...

Mon, 03 Jan 2011 16:32:26 -0500

nedhepburn:

Tumblr is getting stale as fuck. There’s all these brands it seems ripping off Coatney’s Newsweek Tumblr, which was great, but now all these brands are coming off as mini Seinfelds just popping off non sequiters about how rad it is to live in New York or some shit. Shit, dude. I knew new media was pretty incestuous but this is like watching 50 Ben Stein’s circle jerk. Snark is a dead scene, dude. Zzzzz.

Update: this is not a dig at Coatney. It’s a dig at people that are copying and not coming up without their own voice. Take BlackBook or Vogue or The Atlantic or NPR, or even GQ on a good day. They are all great and original voices. So many others are just NYCircleJerks.

We like to reblog when the rebloggin’s good.

The Best Ways to Stream Netflix From gaming consoles to set-top...

Mon, 03 Jan 2011 10:16:22 -0500

The Best Ways to Stream Netflix

From gaming consoles to set-top boxes to TVs to portable media devices, Netflix is everywhere. The company that ate Blockbuster and Wal-mart’s lunch when it came to delivering movies to your house—first through the mail, now through digital streaming—has become as ubiquitous as WiFi. It won’t be long until grandma’s replacement hip will be Netflix enabled. But which is the easiest, cheapest, and most convenient option? If only life were that simple…

10 Christmas Movies That Won’t Be Getting Any Cable...

Fri, 17 Dec 2010 14:03:18 -0500

10 Christmas Movies That Won’t Be Getting Any Cable Marathons

Becoming a beloved holiday movie staple is smart business (after all, that way each time the most wonderful time of the year rolls around people will want to see you again). Sadly, not every film can achieve A Christmas Story status, thus we salute these lumps of coal in your cinematic stocking.

Photo

Wed, 08 Dec 2010 10:35:46 -0500

“Remember, what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. Except for...

Thu, 02 Dec 2010 19:00:07 -0500

“Remember, what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. Except for herpes. That shit’ll come back with you.”

Every time.

Don’t even get us started.

Thu, 02 Dec 2010 17:05:12 -0500

Don’t even get us started.

newyorker: “Black Swan” opens today. Get David Denby’s...

Wed, 01 Dec 2010 12:49:00 -0500

newyorker:

“Black Swan” opens today. Get David Denby’s take:

“‘Black Swan’ turns Freud’s uncanny into shtick; the sinister elements are overloaded and overdetermined. After a while, you realize that the film is a case of ersatz formalism disguising chaos. For instance, the ‘All About Eve’ business with dancers preying on one another was retained from a discarded screenplay by Andrés Heinz, who worked on the final version of ‘Black Swan’ with Mark Heyman and John J. McLaughlin. As a device, it’s clunky and redundant.”

Yes, but we hear Mila and Natalie make out. That’s a redundancy we would like to judge on our own, Denby.